Effective Rule Making

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thegayboybible: 

“Boy, no matter where i place my dick, I expect you to ask permission before sucking it or fucking it. Beg me.”- Alexander Martin. I find rules incredibly hot. Being able to mold someone else’s behavior as I see fit to my own benefit is a big turn on. Below I’ll explore how to construct useful rules and the mindset to have while thinking them through.

- Lots of rules: Rules should help you craft the right headspace for your submissive. If you want him to feel like he’s in a highly disciplined environment you can certainly do that by creating a lot of rules. That requires you to create a lot of rules and remember them to enforce them. It also doesn’t allow for a submissive to enter subspace and just exist as a submissive because he needs to remain cognizant of rules. I, instead, advocate the use of fewer rules that are far stricter. For example: “Slave, before you may have food or drink, or make use of the facilities, you must first offer them to use at my leisure.” or “You must only wear clothing in public I approve.”

- Rules should have a purpose: This one sounds straightforward but you’d be surprised how easily making a rule purely for your amusement can be. Sometimes dominants can make up rules that are contradictory for the purpose of having an excuse to punish submissives. Submissives are logical people like anyone else and will know when you’re making shit up just to punishment. In this circumstance, it could simply be more productive to set aside time for punishment instead of waiting for your submissive to stumble into your clever pit trap. A submissive might fall for that once or twice, but thereafter probably wouldn’t once he recognizes the pitfall.

This brings us to the other side of that very coin. That submissives and dominants can absolutely get off on experiencing an enjoyment of pain through the lens of punishment. A submissive may feel a rush in being punished because he behaved badly and his Sir is correcting his naughty behavior. A dominant may enjoy the cat and mouse nature of a mischievous submissive that misbehaves and is caught who he gets to punish as he sees fit. From this perspective a rule is enhancing the enjoyment of dominant and submissive, bringing an erotic thrill to protocol.

- Rules must consider the submissive: I touched on this in the article I did about punishments. @bredbeta​ is a very obedient boy. He HATES to think he has displeased me in some way. My disappointment is for him a VERY severe punishment. If I were to actually punish him on top of that… he would be CRUSHED. I have a very different punishment and behavior corrective protocol for him than I would have for a boy who enjoys punishment (as described above). I do this because I know my boy. I consider who he is, and how I know him before punishing him at all. It is not unreasonable as a relationship is progressing to have a discussion about what punishments are acceptable. It is true, it certainly does impede on the fantasy made reality a bit to get submissive approved punishments, but would you rather punish someone as you see fit and potentially have him leave you and never come back or would you rather retain that submissive? You could be someone’s story or worse yet, someone’s bad experience he flashes back to when trying to trust other dominants. Take the time, have the conversation. Listen.

- Rules should be based on what’s realistically possible: This is the difference between having a submissive in chastity and codifying a rule that he must submit a photo of his locked cock once every 5 minutes to your phone via text message, and a photo once a week every week when he’s away from town. I am a big advocate that in being honest about who we are as dominants and submissives alike that we can indeed create relationships that account for our flaws. For example issues around cheating (as discussed in the relationships article). I would even go so far as to suggest that rules when initially created be acknowledged as transitional until you can try them out and see how they fit for both parties, then tweaked when and where necessary. As dominants we are responsible for our submissives and their wellbeing. That is a power we must all endeavor to take seriously.

Punishing subs

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Alexander Martin:

One of the first quandaries I came across when exploring kink was how one punishes a submissive that enjoys pain or otherwise requires unconventional punishment. So I’m going to include some suggestions for punishments and some techniques to apply to them. This is not a comprehensive list of punishments just punishments that I have done myself and can therefore speak on from personal experience. It is important to talk to submissives about punishment and make sure that you won’t cross the line with any punishments you use. Talk to them in advance of needing them. Let them know the kinds of punishments you employ and make sure when you use one you clearly state what they did wrong, what they should do to correct the behavior, give them a chance to correct it, and make certain to reassure them that you still care for them.

- Scale of 1 to 10: This is not a punishment but it goes well with most punishments. One of the problems I’ve had with subs is that they do not often understand how serious I consider a wrong doing. For this, I say “on a scale of 1 to 10 how mad do you think I am?” Often, the number reported is a few points higher than it actually is and it helps submissives learn what is serious and what an infraction is. Subs inherently want to please you and it can be hard on some subs to be punished at all (bredbeta is a VERY good boy and does not seek punishment). Using this techniquein tandem with any of the punishments below to make it so

- Time out: Time out sounds like something that is useful for 5 year olds but it works very well for submissives of all ages. Before I go any further, some submissives HATE time out and it is important to ask about it before implementing it because they will take it VERY seriously and VERY personally if you do it. Time outs are pretty simple. Firmly grip the offending boy, explain what went wrong, explain that they’re getting a time out and for how long it will be, then instruct them to assume time out. Usually you’ll have them sit in a corner quietly for a few minutes. Sometimes subs will find it hard to settle down and will act out or otherwise test your patience. If this happens, walk over, calmly inform them they’re in time out and explain how you expect them to behave and what they should be doing. Explain you’re going to extend the time out for 1 more minute. If issues continue, I have often found adding a blanket over their head/body is useful to get them calmer.

- Ben gay: This punishment requires a bottle of ben gay. Merely smear it over the submissive’s balls and cock. This will result in an extremely unpleasant burning sensation. I STRONGLY recommend smearing a small amount of this cream in the space between the thigh and the balls. That area of skin is thin enough that you will get an sense of how bad the burn is. If you apply it and the submissive changes his mind and wants the ben gay removed you can find this elsewhere on the web, but here’s the short version of what to do. Get some tissues and remove as much of the cream from the surface of the skin as possible. Then saturate a cotton ball with olive oil and wipe against the skin until the burning sensation lessens. When you are ready to remove the olive oil use soapy cold water. DO NOT use warm water, doing so will open up pores in the skin and residual ben gay can penetrate there and then there’s nothing more you can do to stop the pain and it will have to be waited out.

- Spanking: Sure, a standard open hand can do wonders, so can a paddle, cane, or crop. You may also find a rough bristle brush to be very useful for creating a nasty stinging for a day or two. Once you start thinking about rough objects like the brush you could use, objects will begin to light up when looking around the room.

- Tickles: This may not sound that bad, but tying someone up and tickling them for 5 minutes straight can really be a torture. I will sometimes use this punishment for lighter infractions.

- Soaping: This is a really old school punishment but it is as effective now as it was then. You force your boy to take soap into his mouth and suck on it (but not swallow) for a time determined by you. Some guys really get off on this kind of punishment and will actually seek it out so be wary who it is actually a reward for.

How to Manipulate Pain Processing

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Alexander Martin:

As a companion to the article I wrote on processing pain, this article is written to fellow dominants about how to manipulate the pain experience.

Why? Pain is often a coarse experience for people. You scrape your knees and the scrapes are uneven, some parts the injury is deeper than others and the experience is mixed. A top acting in a deliberate fashion can create a more even experience. For example, I get out a crop, and I use the leather strips at the end and with three quick strokes can create a triangle on your skin through friction. I can then press my fingers along the outline with varying or even pressure depending on the type of sensation I want to inflict and what you enjoy. I want to create a fine and nuanced experiences for my masochists by being masterful in how I inflict pain and sensation.

Manipulating the ways a submissive manages pain is a more advanced technique than simply hitting them. They’re trying to cope with pain and you’re trying to disrupt it periodically to vary their experience of the scene. It allows for you to use more fine control in creating pain which allows you to play longer without exhausting yourself.

- Breathing: I hinted at one of the easier ways to disrupt breathing which is the simple application of a gag. Personally, I find the hand to be a far better tool than a gag (but you may need the gag if the bottom is being nosier than is polite to your neighbors or roommate). By using my hand, I can cover the mouth while leaving the nostrils exposed allowing me to restrict incoming airflow but very quickly remove the obstruction. A gag does work, but since it can require some time to apply and remove it can be problematic because insufficient oxygen is a potential problem. It’s best to apply breathing disruptions for brief periods of time, no more than 15-20 seconds should be needed to result in the kind of flare up of pain you’re after.

- Clenching: This is a harder technique to disrupt. You can stop hand clenching by putting someone in leather restraints or rope. More experienced submissives will recognize that they can tense up their ass cheeks to become quite hard which will both deflect your blows and allow them to use that clench to help compensate for pain. What you should do is vary up what you’re doing or bark an order just to bring the submissive out of his internal space and focused on you which prevents his focus on being away from the pain.

- Biting: Biting is something as a dominant you should be watching out for with your bottoms. A particularly tense jaw is not a great sign. That kind of grinding can lead to tension headaches and you should teach submissives to use other methods. As for disrupting biting, it’s best to stop with a strong grip to the face, get the submissive to look you in the eye and talk. Ask questions; get him to say “yes sir/master/lord”, anything to get him to use his jaw for a moment.

- Tickling: This technique is a particularly devious one and it is important to remember that while tickling sounds mostly harmless there are people out there who REALLY hate it and you should make a point of finding out how someone feels about tickling before engaging in it. Tickling is a useful disruptive technique because if your target is ticklish the response is reflexive and they simply react to it causing them to squirm and jar in a variety of directions while disrupting control.

- Exhaustion: Lastly as a point of safety. I want to talk about signs of exhaustion in submissives and what to look for. Submissives are in it for their own experience with pain and that experience with you in particular. Pride, a desire to please, and just getting caught up in the moment can all be factors preventing a submissive from identifying when he’s had enough.

Look for:

- Sagging body posture.

- Labored breathing.

- Spacey look in the eyes.

- Slowed response to questions.

- Disorientation.

If you see these signs it is probable that a submissive is nearing his limits for play. It is important to offer aftercare at that point if the submissive wants it and to especially offer lots of water. I keep a 1 gallon Rubbermaid pitcher in my room and a water bottle that is always topped off whenever I play.

How to Process Pain

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Alexander Martin:

I want to talk about how to handle pain being doled out by a Sir. If you want to get anything out of the intense experiences pain can bring then you’ll need to learn how to cope with physical pain.

When your nerves light up with pain, they are more awake than normal. So any sensation, pain or pleasure will be felt more intensely. That is why so often dominants alternate between pain and pleasure to take advantage of the intensity of sensation that can be achieved by stimulating raw nerves.

The point of processing pain is to help you cope with higher levels of pain. The more pain you can experience without undue stress, the more intense sensation play can be. It is a form of play that has a great deal of depth to it and the adrenal high further intensifies the experience and can strengthen bonding between top and bottom. Furthermore, learning to process pain is useful in day to day life, and in case someone hits you harder than you expected them to allowing you to recover without writhing.

To define my terms what I mean by “process pain” is a mental or physical trick you use to lessen the sensation of pain. As a child, when I skinned my knee my parents told me to simply wait and pain would end. The reality is that while pain may not be something that can be entirely suppressed it is still quite possible for you to deaden the sensation with a physical trick or willpower.

- The Three Types of Pain -

One of the other traps pain play tends to fall into is that there are essentially three types of pain and different people enjoy or hate different types of sensation and that can lead them to write off the entire practice if they happen across the one they like the least first.

- Thudding: This type of pain is usually inflicted by canes, crops, and paddles. It is pretty much what it sounds like. These toys often hit with a thud and that thud is impactful at a point and spreads a short distance from the impact. The pain can be intense but because it tends to spread out from the location of impact it is usually shorter lived.

- Stinging: Stinging pain is often inflicted by flogs and whips. Stinging toys impact and area and the pain does not spread but tends to sit on the location of the impact while taking longer to dissipate. I personally find the stinging sensation more difficult to manage because it takes longer to fade and thus can build up if the blows are too frequent and the submissive is inexperienced.

- Cutting: This kind of pain is usually inflicted by knives. I have very little experience with knife play and cannot comment on it much, but others have told me that intense whipping scenes can also simulate this sensation because whips can in fact slice open skin if desired. Cutting pain is derived from an actual injury rather than simply an impact, but like an impact it is of course possible to control how fine or coarse the pain is depending on the implement used and how. I would consider cutting pain to be something to be sought after once you feel you have a very trusted partner and experience dealing with pain play. It’s not for beginners.

- Techniques -

- Focus: This is probably one of the key components to most methods of processing pain. You need to shift your focus from the site and source of the pain to something that helps calm you. I’ll list some methods below but focus requires some personal discipline and practice to accomplish. So go slow when you first try pain play to give yourself some time to learn it right.

- Breathe through it: The first technique is the simplest. Breathe through it. Take deep breathes. Be careful about the speed at which you take the breaths. Too slow and you’ll get light headed and too fast and you’ll hyperventilate. The true point in breathing through it is to feel the oxygen fill your lungs. Your focus should be on breathing not the sensation of pain. Breathing is such a simple process but with some practice you can begin to feel pain being breathed out which can help much more quickly dull the harsher sensations.

- Clenching: All you need to do is squeeze down on with your fist on a pillow, ball, mattress, almost anything soft that won’t be destroyed by your grip. The objective here is to grip hard and focus on maintaining that grip with pressure. The pressure will actually make the experience of pain deaden a bit as you grip.

- Biting: This technique is something you should do very sparingly. It involves biting down on something soft (such as a gag). I don’t recommend this technique because you can damage your teeth or your jaw. It is useful primarily as management for more intense play when you are unable to manage the aforementioned techniques. If you’re strapped to a Saint Andrew’s cross and your dominant hits you a bit too hard you can bite down on the gag as a method for management.

- Meditation: Meditation is not something I would recommend in the moment but it is a useful precursor practice to experiencing pain. There are more resources out there for meditation than I could ever list so poke around and see what works for you. Meditation is a useful thing to practice to learn to control your body and your mind. If you are a particularly anxious person I also recommend it as a way to learn to self soothe. Anxiety will heighten the experience of pain and can lead to panic if you’re not careful.

- Almost ouch: This isn’t so much a technique for processing pain as it is for learning your limits. For the newest of players you want to be hit at a speed, pressure, and angle that is uncomfortable but doesn’t quite hurt. You should not be starting out simply getting wailed on as hard as the top can manage. You should build up to it because doing so floods your mind with endorphins which in addition to everything else above allows even better pain tolerance (and a nice natural high) which can build up more endorphins creating some truly outstanding sensations and head space. It’s a good line because it will redraw itself as your mind’s capacity for accepting pain changes and expands.

I’m No Masochist. I’ve Never Been A Pain Slut.

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memoryanddesire-stirring:

I’m no masochist. I’ve never been a pain slut. I cry when I stub my toe and go to great lengths to avoid anything with even the slightest possibility of pain. My take on paper cuts? A justifiable cause to avoid envelopes. Bang my head on a closet shelf? Cause for medical care and probably an MRI. Clover clamps? Should have been named nipple tourniquets from hell. I know how to take care of myself: avoid anything that hurts.

I know I’m supposed to like it—how does one belong in a BDSM lifestyle without liking pain? I’ll admit I love being bound, immobile, and used. I even like floggings and spankings and the like…to a point. But pain? Real pain? It does nothing for me. I don’t become instantly aroused with labia clips and nipple clamps. Or do I? Is it possible to be sure? 

Because I know, when I attempt those things, I wince, I curse, everything in my brain tells me to avoid it;, but there’s something else that I don’t quite understand: I keep doing it—and at the end of the day, I find myself smiling about it. Glad that I was able to withstand it…for Him. For only Him. 

At the end of the day, when He debases me, I learn my value; when He humiliates me, I learn humility; when He inflicts pain, I learn my strength. I learn that I am strongest when I show Him my weakness…The more I endure for Him, the more I want to give. I give Him this, because He has earned my utmost trust and devotion. 

He shows me patience and kindness, the need for discipline and allowance, and when each is appropriate. He teaches me the necessity for all those things, for myself as much as for others. He is the only person strong enough to help me learn those lessons, to free me from those fears that keep me bound in my own head.

I don’t want to hurt, to feel pain, to throb for hours on end waiting for relief, but I do. It isn’t the pain. Rather, it is because knowing that I withstand it for Him makes me proud, makes me feel stronger for having surrendered to it. 

Because making Him happy gives me a joy I’ve never felt before that goes far beyond any sexual pleasure. Because serving Him makes me better at…well…just being me. It grounds me and gives me focus. It reminds me who I am. Because hearing that He enjoys any task I’ve done solely for His pleasure gives me purpose.

It is not as simple as someone telling me to do something and doing it. It is sublimely different. It is giving in its purest form. It’s wanting to give over everything that I am to the Man who has earned it, whose will I long to follow, the Man for whom I am willing to face my deepest fears and accept intense moments of pain despite my own voices telling me to hide. 

Because that is the way to break down the barriers I’ve spent a lifetime building—to give Him that opening, that exposure, a blossoming of sorts, that no one has ever seen, that no one else has ever drawn from me. Only Him. Only He shows me who I need to be for myself. And in doing so, I feel safe. I feel protected. I feel loved.

I want Him to have it all: my fear, my tears, my anger, my passion…even my pain, and all my pleasure. I want Him to feel every thought, every need, every sense I have, because they belong to Him. To give Him all this, all that I am, all that I hope to be, I am willing to surrender to the fear, to the things I’ve avoided, to a will bigger than my own. 

I surrender to Him knowing that for all His savagery, there is tenderness. For all I endure, all the devotion I offer Him in my suffering, I receive His admiration and care back tenfold. I surrender because in everything I do, I am His: His servant, His slave, His lover, His ward. And He is my Dominant, my Master, my beloved Sir.

So, no, I’m no masochist. I’m something far better: I am His.

Automatically Turning Pain Into Pleasure

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Thank You Sir! Do you know of someone who would be willing to mentor me about my love of pain? My perception of it seems different than what I’ve read. 
As a kid I thought I had discovered a new, different type of pain. One that felt good, not one like toothache. Quickly learned some pains in nipples, balls, dick gave me a hard on and eventually learned to cum from them hands free.  
However things like spanking hurt and made my little guy shrivel. Now when I read stories about guys who actually find giving pain erotic – sounds like an impossible dream. 
Yet there are only descriptions of one type of pain. The kind that is intended to be a warning, a kind to be avoided. No one seems to know the kind I feel. Am I over thinking? Don’t want analyzing to take away its magic.

This is a topic that is close to my heart.  Thanks for bringing it up.  People’s bodies do NOT all respond in all of the same ways.  It’s a fact.

An easy test is whether a man’s nipples are “wired directly to his dick,”  For many men, there is no connection whatsoever, but for others, firm nipple-play is a perfect and erotic thrill that can make some men cum hands-free.

(Sidebar thought:  No matter what, I NEVER start nipple-play with the Pliers Approach. Only beginners or inebriated barflies would do that.  Gentle twiddling, leading up to a firmer approach, based upon positive reactions, is always best.)

One of my slaves loves cock-and-ball-torture (CBT).  The other one can’t handle even gentle handling of his balls.  They are both perfectly normal, for THEM.

In the last forty years, I have met men like you - You are perfectly normal, for YOU.  That is a wonderful thing.  First, some background information.

An Ethical Sir CALIBRATES

I am a huge, strong man, and I have had to approach most submissive men very carefully… almost like defusing a bomb.  I have had to “calibrate” during every encounter (I explain how, in this video).
I could break just about anybody like a twig, particularly if I am wielding a ferocious kinky toy.  I could go to JAIL, if I am not paying full attention to the effects of my behavior.
I even had to take 4-½ years of karate classes, to get me past my fear of hitting people.  I’ve been this huge since 1968, and the larger culture has told me not to hit anybody smaller than me.  Well, that doesn’t leave me a lot of options!

Hamburger Harold

I had a collared boy for a while, who brought me great pleasure.  Harold had MANY virtues, but he had one special gift that really got my Sadist Glands secreting like mad.
He could turn pain into pleasure, instantly.  This is rare, and it sounds like you have that same capability.

When playing with Harold, I would break out a particular Kevlar-tipped singletail whip.  It was “blood-bonded” to him, alone.  Breaking the skin and causing blood to flow is hardcore and very rare play.  It’s not healthy or polite to share those fluids between submissives.  So, Harold kept and maintained the whip that I used upon him, alone.
I nicknamed him “Hamburger Harold” as a loving reference to his abilities to go so hardcore.

He never required or wanted foreplay - He wanted to just step up to the wall and get whipped.  He’d hum, and and dance slowly from one foot to another.  I was timid in my approach, at first.  I couldn’t believe that I could be so fortunate.
Before Harold, I would have to travel to San Francisco to find somebody who had that rare, special gift of instantly transferring pain into pleasure.  I would meet up with men whose backs were one big callus, from having been whipped bloody so many times.

I could finally get a lot further along in my sadistic pleasures than most submissives would desire. I could crank up the energy, and he’d thank me very happily, afterward.  Then, we would scrub the blood off of the walls. CSI would have had a very interesting time analyzing what had happened there!

Harold broke up with me when he realized that he needed more than I could provide, relationship-wise (I have a full-time husband).  I still miss him.  He had many valuable traits, and he had a big, beautiful heart.  He was a really good boy, and he had EARNED that collar, so he kept it when he left.

Angry Punishment Versus Extreme Intimacy.  There IS a Difference!

The key point that needs to be made, based upon what you have shared, is that ATTITUDE is what matters to you.  If I am yelling angry, abusive and punishing words at you, then you lose the pleasurable aspect.  That’s fine, and it has never been my style.

My attitude when playing with a submissive, wherever he shows up on the spectrum of pain, is a strong desire to take him to the highest heights of pleasure.  I want very much to create happy memories that will last him for a lifetime.  I’m quite clear that if Harold moved back to my town, he would tell stories of some very joyful aspects of our play, with zero regrets.

My final thought?  You sound like a treasure, and my wish is that you keep reading my blog entries.  If you find a Sir who is a good match, have him read my stuff, too, so that he knows how to treat somebody as special and valuable as you are.

Pain Play, and Gaining Marks, Explained

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Papa Tony:  I often rant about how the stereotypes about kinky pain and hardcore play is not ALL that there is. I’m well-known for that. I often advocate for sensitivity and mutually-pleasurable scenes. It’s how I roll.

AND, there is a lot of good to be said about mutually-enjoyed pain play. A very small percentage of men have the ability to instantly convert pain into pleasure.

Or, the sub doesn’t seek pain at all, and would be perfectly happy if it never happened again. But, NOTHING pleases him more than to make his Sir happy, even if it’s a struggle sometimes. Pain can be a very welcome part of his service.

I have played with many men over the decades who have had their backs covered in calluses from having experienced so many hardcore play scenes. That is their pleasure.

There have been times where we have had to scrub the walls after playing. I was always grateful that we forgot to invite the CSI crew over to join us. 😈 Perhaps we SHOULD have invited the Kinky Scene Investigators, and gotten a few useful tips!

It’s Not For Everybody, So Be Careful, Doms!

A true Pain Pig (also referred to as a Pain Slut) is a blessing to find, if that is what gets you going. However, I would be surprised if such subs take up more than one percent of the human population. It’s NEVER safe to assume that subs are looking for hardcore play, It can take years (and plenty of mutual growth) before that day shows up.

A Kinky Progression

Both of my slaves told me what their “Hard NO!” limits were, back when we were first negotiating our ongoing relationships. These included “No Pain, and No Marks.” I have never once tried to convince them to change their minds. I am an Ethical Sir.

Then, months along, the sub raises his head after a light spanking and says “Is that all ya got?” And… off we go into a deeper and different relationship. The years flow past.

Now, both of them can take vastly harder treatment than when we first met, and I STILL have never manipulated them into something that they would object to. We just kept building Trust with capital T, and mutually shifted the parameters of our play, a little bit at a time.

The Payoff

I have written about “Trophy Photos.” Who would care about such things? Well, in my direct experience, a dedicated and motivated sub, who has a great zeal to be the best sub that he can be, likes to have mementos of his personal triumphs.

I have had subs strut around naked in gym locker rooms, or going shirtless on public streets, just to show off marks that can ONLY be obtained in one way. They are showing off their kinky pride, and living their truth.

They are true, high-quality kinksters, and the level of authenticity rises in the world as a direct result.

What would you say is a good way to leave a lasting mark during an impact play session? I have regular sessions with my Sir, but we’re both frustrated with how quickly my ass goes from cherry red back to normal
I’d like to have some lasting welts or bruises, but not sure what the best way to get them are, aside from just wailing on my ass with something
He is using his hands, a leather crop, a padded leather baton type thing, a rubber paddle, a wooden paddle with rubber boot treads on one side, a leather belt or a thick leather strap.

You’ve both watched my video, right? That’s a good start.

For MY needs, if I want to leave some marks, then it’s time to bring out the Tommy Tomcat and the singletail whip. Here is why: The need is for harder, more-narrowly-focused strikes.

Tell your Sir that he has found a treasure of great value.

Leaving Marks, on the Ass That Can't Get Enough of 'Em

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Papa Tony:

Paddle made from Cocobolo wood.  These are easy to find.

Click here to watch the instructional video on YouTube.

One of the men that I mentor has had the incredible good luck to find a submissive who adores heavy play on his ass.  Questions arose as a result, and the video is meant to cover those questions.

What conclusions are reached in this video?

- Cocobolo Wood is Best

- A Submissive Who Adores Heavy Play Needs A Collar And A Place Next To You Every Night In Bed.

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Trophy Pictures

The following images are "Trophies" for the submissive who has brought pleasure, and earned my respect.  I talk more about this concept here.

Plain old spanking.

One good, hard smack.

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Tommy Tomcat, found here.

Clearly, NOT his butt, but this shows what 

marks can result from a Tommy Tomcat.

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"PTSM" Singletail Whip, found here.

Cocobolo paddle.

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Dragon's Tongue, with Leg Spreader.

Dragon's Tongue, under black light.

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Leather Belt.