Showing posts with label #ImpactPlay. Show all posts
Showing posts with label #ImpactPlay. Show all posts

Sunday, March 17, 2019

Florentine Flogging, Lesson One with Travis:

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Tuesday, August 6, 2014

Previous publicity for this event.


From Papa Tony:  Travis is an incredible teacher, and we all made progress. He taught basic Florentine Flogging, which means using two floggers simultaneously.

I don't know about anybody else, but I am NEVER going to depend so much upon one hand, ever again!  It's really nice using two.


Thanks to our gracious host slave keith, it was a warm, safe and welcoming space. As you can see in the photo above, the men were intimate, sociable and playful!

Even better, we get to practice our new skills at tonight's Hands-On Demo… RSVP to SignMeUpForEvent @ gmail.com to get the location.

Thursday, January 10, 2019

Ritual Conditioning

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aphyr: I related to SIR this morning that I’d jerked off in an effort to get a little more sleep, and he asked me whether I’d come without permission. We hadn’t discussed any sort of control over my sexual habits until that point–and then, suddenly, several things clicked into place.

SIR’s choice of where to add constraints and ritual into my life aren’t just fetishes in themselves. He applies control to the things I enjoy most: lifting, fucking, eating–conditioning me to associate him, and his power over me, with my most pleasurable and valuable experiences.

I’m used to direct associative conditioning–my first SIR, for instance, turned my nipples from what-are-these-random-bits-of-hardware-buried-in-the-back-of-the-misc-drawer to reliable instigators of arousal, by squeezing and tugging on them to the point of pain while I jerked off. Now I love having them played with.

I’ve also experienced both reward and punishment-driven operant conditioning–it’s usually obvious when that’s going on. If I’m a good boy, he’ll reward me with head-scratches, affection, food, toys, etc. One tries to make the link between behavior and reward as immediate and obvious as possible, either by rewarding immediately after the desired behavior, or through directed recall.

If I disobey orders or let my Master down, he might remove privileges (negative punishment) or hit me (positive punishment). If he hits me, he’ll hit me hard. While reminding me exactly what I did, how it made him feel, and what I should do next time. It’s a short, intense, focused experience. I should note, for readers not accustomed to healthy S/M practice, that this kind of punishment is consensual and enjoyable at a metalevel, even though it hurts like hell. It’s also distinct from a pleasurable beating, where the goal is to enjoy the sensation, endorphin rush, and headspace. If anyone ever strikes you and you’re not enjoying it on some level, they need to stop.

Anyway, what I realized today was that SIR’s choice of where to apply control isn’t just linked to what he finds hot or rewarding personally. It’s also designed to bring a focus on him into my favorite activities, strengthening my positive association with his control. Yes, he loves watching me eat from a bowl on the floor–it’s degrading and hot for both of us–but it also reminds me that he’s in charge of food, and food is one of my favorite things in the world. Now SIR is a part of that.

And that power recirculates: as fulfilling SIR’s control becomes a stronger desire independent from untrained stimuli, we can use that desire to reach both of our goals. I’ve wanted to be huge and powerful ever since I was a kid, and SIR wants a submissive musclebound pup. The hunger to obey SIR, as an external locus of control, helps me focus on eating, on sleeping, on maintaining good form and training to exhaustion every time. SIR wants me to fist him and take his fist, which has never done much for me intrinsically–but as our training deepens, I find that experience more and more desirable. And the association of pleasure with obedience helps me transmute the pain of a whipping into deep satisfaction.

All of this relies on SIR’s judgement being sound; on him knowing, valuing, and balancing my desires and capabilities with his own. As in Aikido, our mutuality stems from my ability to extend trust, and his ability to extend compassion. It’s one of the things that makes S/M so deeply enjoyable for me.

Sunday, January 6, 2019

Whips and Canes

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fearslave:

Over the weekend i did a stock-taking on Master’s collection of floggers, whips, canes and batons. I thought that it would be interesting to write about them.

Whips/Floggers from left to right:


A and B, Flogger: Master doesn’t use floggers on me often. They just look big and intimidating, but don’t hurt at all (well, at least compared to single tail). i do feel a deeper “impact” like big palm slapping/hitting me when Master flogs me, but it’s just too mild for Master’s standard. Master seldom does warm-up in a whipping so they are of even less use.

C, Flogger: it’s a flogger with much thinner leather lashes, so stings a little more.

D, Cat o’ Nine Tails: the weird name impressed me 15 years ago when i first heard of it in an online chat. Finally it was Master who first used such thing on me. It was a good one, delivering spicy stings but different from single tails.

E, Single Tail: it was my tribute to Master several years ago. A fine plait whip made of kangaroo leather, the best leather for whips. It’s shorter and a bit stiff, so it hurts badly, maybe the worst among the leather whips Master has.

F. Single Tail: it’s the first whip that Master used on me, so it’s special and still my favorite. It’s probably cowhide, with a darker and shinier look than kangaroo.

G Single Tail: it’s another kangaroo whip, with the same duller shine. What’s different is that it has a handle at the end, so it must be a bit different when holding and wielding it.

H. Single Tail: i think this one is rubber. It feels very different on my back compared to the three leather ones. It gives a harder “pull” on the skin when it hits, which hurts really bad not in a “right” way. Leather is still much better than rubber when it’s a whip.

I. Short Whip: its plait is not as fine, and it has a firm leather bead at the end. It’s very effective to whip all over my body, and the bead hurts really bad.

J. Short Whip: it’s a rubber one with a leather tail. Also, very effective and Master uses it to give me bastinado too.

Canes/Batons from right to left:


K. Rubber Baton: it can hit quite heavily and the pain can be both dull and sharp.

L. Wood Bat: a smaller version of baseball bat. Master likes to hit my balls with it.

M. Metal Stick: it’s an interesting cane, probably made of aluminum given its weight and the same shine as a MacBook. i always wonder if it can be used with electro too.

N. Stick: i guess it’s a wood stick with a leather cover.

O. Cane: a typical cane, very effective and makes the wind sound.

P. Dressage Whip: the worst (or best) among its peers. Thin and stiff, the pain is much worse than a cane.

Q. Riding Crop: a well made one from a high-end brand, which is supposed to be for real horses.

Tuesday, December 25, 2018

Toybag Tour, Thud vs. Sting: Floggers and Whips and Such

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Anonymous: What would you say is a good implement scale for impact play? Like, the farther up the scale the more intense it is.


Papa Tony:

Funny that you should ask. I periodically design toys for FlogMeBaby.com - I have NO financial connection with them. Not a single penny. I do this work because I want new Doms to build their own toy bag with solid-quality toys without having to go broke doing it.

 

I invented a two-sided scale for them that shows where a particular toy fits between STING and THUD. You can see it on the upper left, in pink.

That scale has proven to be a very practical way to make valid shopping decisions without being able to actually try out the toy first.

I admire craftspeople who hand-craft exquisite, expensive ($300-$500) floggers. I have owned a bunch over the years. However, I like to recommend toys that are high-quality, but inexpensive. It’s awkward for a newbie Flogging Top to learn proper practices by guess and by golly, with a huge, awkward flogger (or a wimpy one, shown below) sold at the local porn emporium.

That’s why I always steer folks toward my flogging instructional video, and recommend good starter toys that will last a long time, without eliminating the Grocery Fund for a month.

I can’t tell you how many new Sirs that I have met with outrageously rough, inappropriate Instruments of Torture that they thought that might be a good choice, and then no subs will let them go for more than a few strokes… The actual goal is perfect, thrilling power-flow that fluctuates smoothly as the circumstances allow.



This is my leather toy bag, which is a tiny subset of my larger toy collection. I carry the bag with me when I am attending parties. It is also what the slave brings upstairs when he arrives and sets up the scene to my specifications. This is because it contains my collection of favorite, most useful toys. Today, we are ignoring the paddles, crops and canes, and discussing the floggers and whips.



I have arranged a few of my toys to illustrate the range of sensations caused by various toys along the spectrum of “Thud” on the left, and progressively more intense with the “Sting” selection on the right.

Explaining The Tall Socks



When you have a bunch of floggers in a bag or a wheeled, carry-on piece of luggage, the skinny tails can make quite a mess of tangles. So, have the submissive clean up after the scene by pulling a tall sock over the forearm until there is a “sock puppet:”


Use the “mouth” to grab the ends of the flogger tails, and then use the other hand to pull the sock over the entire flogger. Long socks like this can be found at the Junior Miss section at your local Target or Walmart.

The Bunny: Very Thuddy



Starting at the far left of the “Thuddy” side of the scale, the Bunny is made of lengths of rope, covered in bunny fur. It’s at least three decades old. How did I keep it in such great shape? I kept it away from young dogs. They ALL want to shred it!

It’s a very exaggerated toy. I would never use it on a person with a slender frame. I wouldn’t want to break their ribs! The ideal bottom for this is somebody with a wide, well-padded back.

I throw it with a two-handed, “baseball bat” throw, from the side, striking against the UPPER back. Stay far away from the lower back. This one is for piggy bottoms who can’t stand Sting, but adore Thud… the heavier the better.

The Big, Heavy Flogger



Moving one notch away to the right. This category is VERY typical of high-end, more-expensive floggers that are everywhere on the market. The one shown in the picture above cost me $350.

My recommendation for such a toy is the Mister Thuddy. I helped design it years ago. I just checked: it costs 45 bucks. Not a good beginner flogger (I have trained many hundreds of Flogging Tops), but a very nice second flogger. This is what the result looks like, after using it.

My Favorite Flogger - Medium Weight



This is the Thumper, and it comes from FlogMeBaby. I didn’t design this one, but if I had, I would not change a single thing about it. I have raved about them, in detail. If I had ONE toy in my possession, this would be the one for me, hands down. I demonstrate many, many ways to use it, here. This photo shows a nice aftermath.

If you are going to learn how to use it, start by practicing the Loose Grip, shown in the video that I just linked to. I’ve been using it for forty years, and it is the reason why my wrist and forearm don’t hurt after a long night of playing with a dozen eager subs in a bar.

This next section is the kind of flogger that I avoid:

Wimpy, Flimsy Floggers



I snagged this image off of the Internet, because I would never own floggers like these. If I win some in a raffle basket, I donate them back. You see tons of these in the local “Lingerie and Dildo” stores.

Using a lightweight toy like this in an Impact Play scene would be like using a cardboard tube from a roll of paper towels to beat somebody. There’s no release of kinetic energy, followed by increased endorphins.

On the other hand, if your goal is to get in a fight with a toddler that leaves you both giggling, these floggers are pretty nice.

The Tommy Tomcat



Going further to the right side of the scale. I designed the Tommy Tomcat for FlogMeBaby, based upon a very expensive toy that somehow disappeared from a play-party, a few decades past. I imagine that there are many hundreds of Tomcats in the world, as a result.

Imagine that you are at a kinky play-party. There is one piggy bottom that is being flogged by every Top in the building, and is still going strong when the Doms are all worn out. That is a very strong signal that it’s time to switch over to Sting as a tactic. Every time that I have tested that theory, I have been rewarded with a VERY happy bottom.

If you follow the breaking-in instructions on my page, then you will have the most accurate toy in your entire collection. I never strike any further away than a quarter-inch or so from my desired target when I am using it. It’s amazingly precise. This photo shows the aftermath of a heavy scene.

This video always gives me a thrill. Frankly, I get turned on, watching how well I use that Tomcat. I don’t usually get to see myself from such a different angle.

The Dragon’s Tongue



My two Dragon’s Tongues were hand-made by a buddy. I would love to find a more durable replacement. I will be investigating the purple and red ones that FlogMeBaby sells for twenty bucks each. Mine have been through hell, as you might imagine. I use them a lot.

They are deceptively mild as you warm up the sub, but a sharp “flick” will raise some serious welts. Definitely not to be used on beginners.

Singletail Whip



We have now arrived at ONE of the ultimately “sting-y” toys (not counting fiber-optic floggers - Those will be featured in a future article). The one in the picture above cost me three or four hundred bucks. It’s an Axel whip. Other Tops will stop me when I walk by, and they will say “Oooh! That’s an Axel, isn’t it?” It IS exquisitely made, and it throws like a dream.

HOWEVER. Again, the average beginner can’t seriously buy something like this, and trust that it’s right for them. Singletail whips are DIFFICULT to learn by yourself, to the point where other people trust you to throw whips around without damage to yourself and others.

Luckily, I have posted a Singletail 101 instructional video, for just such a purpose. Once you know how to achieve a perfect spread of singletail strikes on a pillow, you are a good bet to able to do a really good job on a human being.

For those on a budget, I have designed am inexpensive singletail that I can happily recommend. It is called the PTSM - The Papa Tony Signature Model. I just checked. It’s eighty bucks.

Again, I get no special considerations of any kind from FlogMeBaby. I just want to see more safe, fun kinky play happening in the world. It’s the Approving, Kinky Grandpa in me.

Sunday, December 23, 2018

Getting Into New Kink Practices

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I contacted you some time back. I’m wanting to embrace my DOM side. I am experienced at fistfucking, and have a boy that lives in another state that wants me to get into bondage and more (he’s already into taking a fist and is quite proficient at Boot worship..) so I want to expand my repertoire…


Papa Tony:

Bondage

Well, I am the last guy to lecture knowledgeably on Bondage (remembering complex stuff is no longer easy for my elderly brain), but I have had good results recommending the very heterosexual Two Knotty Boys as an excellent resource.

Also:  The Ropey Beginner's FAQ.

My additional suggestions:

- Download ONLY a few videos that appeal to you. and load them onto your phone. That way, you can tell where you screwed up, by scrubbing back and forth. “Oh, it’s supposed to go UNDER at that point, not over!”

- Pick one tutorial. Practice, practice and then practice some more. Then, that bondage technique becomes part of Muscle Memory. From then on, you can confidently strut into a leather bar with some rope stored on your hip. Find a handsome boy and then tie him upon a decorative way. Walk him around the bar, while doing Top Talk with your buddies. That boy will be in heaven, and he will be the envy of every other submissive in the building.

Impact Play

For Impact Play lessons, I am your guy, and I am arrogant enough to say, nobody teaches it better.

I have the reviews to back me up!

What are other helpful suggestions, everybody?

Monday, February 12, 2018

Leaving Marks, on the Ass That Can't Get Enough of 'Em

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Papa Tony:

Paddle made from Cocobolo wood.  These are easy to find.

Click here to watch the instructional video on YouTube.

One of the men that I mentor has had the incredible good luck to find a submissive who adores heavy play on his ass.  Questions arose as a result, and the video is meant to cover those questions.

What conclusions are reached in this video?

- Cocobolo Wood is Best

- A Submissive Who Adores Heavy Play Needs A Collar And A Place Next To You Every Night In Bed.



Trophy Pictures

The following images are "Trophies" for the submissive who has brought pleasure, and earned my respect.  I talk more about this concept here.


Plain old spanking.

One good, hard smack.




Tommy Tomcat, found here.

Clearly, NOT his butt, but this shows what 
marks can result from a Tommy Tomcat.



"PTSM" Singletail Whip, found here.


Cocobolo paddle.




Dragon's Tongue, with Leg Spreader.

Dragon's Tongue, under black light.



Leather Belt.