Cheap (but Effective) Kinkster Toys

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Alexander Martin:

I’m writing all these entries with newer kinksters in mind. Given that I would assume that new kinksters may have a rather small pool of toys if any at all. So below you will find a number of cheap kinkster toys to get you started.

- Clothespins: I’d recommend these for someone starting out with pain play. Apply these to areas where you can pull tight enough skin to attach the clothespin such that it is unlikely to suddenly fly off. Don’t leave them on any space for more than 10 minutes or so. After some time the initial pain of application the area will numb. Twisting the clothes pin can cause the pain to flare up a bit. Do note that clothespins snapping off are incredibly painful and should only be done if the submissive is ok with that. Someone who can handle the pain of clothespins being applied may not be able to handle them snapping off suddenly. Lastly, I recommend the wooden ones as their jaws are solid where the plastic pins use

- Twine: Twine has a variety of uses: tying off genitals, creating a zipper line (using twine to string together clothespins so you can yank them all off at once in a line. This is VERY painful), etc. I recommend not using it for restraints because it can cut off blood flow very easily and painfully.

- Lube shooter: These plastic “syringes” are super useful to have around. They have a very dull tip and a ½ inch diameter. You can insert them directly into your lube bottle and pull the plunger to get the measure of lube that you want to use. The shaft of the syringe is lubricated by sticking it into the lube bottle so you can insert, press down on the plunger and have someone lubed in seconds with no messing around trying to get lube in the hole. Ultimately, be aware that sometimes the lube shooter can break as they’re cheaply made, but at 8 bucks I’ve been a repeat customer because life is so much better with them than without.

- Paddles: Paddles are usually available for pretty cheap and they’re a toy that isn’t generally considered too intimidating and are PERFECT for beginners. I strongly recommend getting one. Pick one that suits your style.

- Rope: Should go without saying that rope is something worth having. If you have any interest at all in bondage, go for it early on and start practicing hard right away. There are plenty of free resources online that can teach you knots and “Two Knotty Boys Show You the Ropes” is a great guide book that can help you get started.

Some notes about toys:

- Toys don’t make the man: You don’t HAVE to own toys to be a good dominant. They can help make a scene more interesting for both you and the boy by adding variety but don’t feel like you have to own a closet full of toys to be respected. Mastery over what you do have is key.

- Don’t buy something to try it out: I bought a beginner’s electro kit because it was on sale for Valentine’s Day and I had an interest in Electro. I rarely get to use it and it turns out a tens unit is the standard toy for electric play and what I got was a weak to moderate violet wand. What I later learned was I should’ve waited until I had someone to play with who was interested in electro to help justify the cost. Chances are, if I met a guy into electro… he’d have his own unit anyways and I could learn from him how to use it safely. There aren’t enough guys into electro in my area that I get to use it more than once or twice a year.

- DO buy toys that add to your central kink: If you’re really into impact play feel free to focus your purchase on toys that support that kink because you’re looking to play with others who share that particular kink anyways.

My Custom-Ordered Kinky Boots

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Papa Tony: 

I admit it - I am a seriously twisted boot fetishist. I have eighteen pairs of boots, and of course, I have my favorites:

I get plenty of good use out of them, believe me:

I recently decided that I had waited for too many years to get what I considered to be my Ultimate Fantasy Boot:

 

The Wesco Jobmaster.

I wanted them to look a particular way, and the only way to do it was to order them custom-built from the Wesco Boots factory.

I called the Wesco factory in Oregon (NOT CHINA) and ordered the $99 refundable package that contained the measuring form and tape, the DVD and a whole bunch of promotional materials. When it arrived, my boy and I did the full measuring routine, covering my entire leg below the knee, since I was ordering knee-high, twenty-inch boots.

I obsessed over the details, because I knew that I would be wearing them a lot, and that they would last me for the rest of my life if I took good care of them. I also wanted them to be uniquely MINE, as a form of self-expression.

I sent off the measurements and the money, and waited. I asked nicely, and they courteously provided me with photos showing my boots being constructed:

This shows the custom-constructed white-and-black “lasts” that represent my rather unique feet. The boots were built around them, so that when the boots arrived at my place, they fit my feet EXACTLY. Somebody recently asked me what size my boots were. I replied “MY size!” (15EEEE).

This shows the lasts being extracted before the boots can be completed.

I’m just shallow enough to have specified every single option that would make me taller (exactly 2-½" taller, in fact), when wearing the boots:

Why would I do such a thing, when I’m already the tallest guy in the building at every event? BECAUSE I CAN. Come on - Wouldn’t you love to show up as six foot seven and a half if you could?

The two boots, together, weigh 12.6 pounds. They are breaking in very nicely, as far as flexibility while walking. They are utterly comfortable, and I get an extra “jolt” to the ego from wearing them. Being a big, dominant kind of guy, I feel like they enhance the overall package.

My vanilla husband made a revealing comment after I had been wearing the boots for a month or so: He said “I would never order boots like that, but they sure are impressive!” I agree, and I’ve never worn them without hearing multiple admiring comments from complete strangers.

UPDATE: Another Custom-Boot Shop

I am hearing good reviews from customers of Embossy Boots in Spain. Perhaps I will give them a spin, next.

August 21st, 2018 4:18pm

Toybag Tour, Thud vs. Sting: Floggers and Whips and Such

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Anonymous: What would you say is a good implement scale for impact play? Like, the farther up the scale the more intense it is.

Papa Tony:

Funny that you should ask. I periodically design toys for FlogMeBaby.com - I have NO financial connection with them. Not a single penny. I do this work because I want new Doms to build their own toy bag with solid-quality toys without having to go broke doing it.

 

I invented a two-sided scale for them that shows where a particular toy fits between STING and THUD. You can see it on the upper left, in pink.

That scale has proven to be a very practical way to make valid shopping decisions without being able to actually try out the toy first.

I admire craftspeople who hand-craft exquisite, expensive ($300-$500) floggers. I have owned a bunch over the years. However, I like to recommend toys that are high-quality, but inexpensive. It’s awkward for a newbie Flogging Top to learn proper practices by guess and by golly, with a huge, awkward flogger (or a wimpy one, shown below) sold at the local porn emporium.

That’s why I always steer folks toward my flogging instructional video, and recommend good starter toys that will last a long time, without eliminating the Grocery Fund for a month.

I can’t tell you how many new Sirs that I have met with outrageously rough, inappropriate Instruments of Torture that they thought that might be a good choice, and then no subs will let them go for more than a few strokes… The actual goal is perfect, thrilling power-flow that fluctuates smoothly as the circumstances allow.

This is my leather toy bag, which is a tiny subset of my larger toy collection. I carry the bag with me when I am attending parties. It is also what the slave brings upstairs when he arrives and sets up the scene to my specifications. This is because it contains my collection of favorite, most useful toys. Today, we are ignoring the paddles, crops and canes, and discussing the floggers and whips.

I have arranged a few of my toys to illustrate the range of sensations caused by various toys along the spectrum of “Thud” on the left, and progressively more intense with the “Sting” selection on the right.

Explaining The Tall Socks

When you have a bunch of floggers in a bag or a wheeled, carry-on piece of luggage, the skinny tails can make quite a mess of tangles. So, have the submissive clean up after the scene by pulling a tall sock over the forearm until there is a “sock puppet:”


Use the “mouth” to grab the ends of the flogger tails, and then use the other hand to pull the sock over the entire flogger. Long socks like this can be found at the Junior Miss section at your local Target or Walmart.

The Bunny: Very Thuddy

Starting at the far left of the “Thuddy” side of the scale, the Bunny is made of lengths of rope, covered in bunny fur. It’s at least three decades old. How did I keep it in such great shape? I kept it away from young dogs. They ALL want to shred it!

It’s a very exaggerated toy. I would never use it on a person with a slender frame. I wouldn’t want to break their ribs! The ideal bottom for this is somebody with a wide, well-padded back.

I throw it with a two-handed, “baseball bat” throw, from the side, striking against the UPPER back. Stay far away from the lower back. This one is for piggy bottoms who can’t stand Sting, but adore Thud… the heavier the better.

The Big, Heavy Flogger

Moving one notch away to the right. This category is VERY typical of high-end, more-expensive floggers that are everywhere on the market. The one shown in the picture above cost me $350.

My recommendation for such a toy is the Mister Thuddy. I helped design it years ago. I just checked: it costs 45 bucks. Not a good beginner flogger (I have trained many hundreds of Flogging Tops), but a very nice second flogger. This is what the result looks like, after using it.

My Favorite Flogger - Medium Weight

This is the Thumper, and it comes from FlogMeBaby. I didn’t design this one, but if I had, I would not change a single thing about it. I have raved about them, in detail. If I had ONE toy in my possession, this would be the one for me, hands down. I demonstrate many, many ways to use it, here. This photo shows a nice aftermath.

If you are going to learn how to use it, start by practicing the Loose Grip, shown in the video that I just linked to. I’ve been using it for forty years, and it is the reason why my wrist and forearm don’t hurt after a long night of playing with a dozen eager subs in a bar.

This next section is the kind of flogger that I avoid:

Wimpy, Flimsy Floggers

I snagged this image off of the Internet, because I would never own floggers like these. If I win some in a raffle basket, I donate them back. You see tons of these in the local “Lingerie and Dildo” stores.

Using a lightweight toy like this in an Impact Play scene would be like using a cardboard tube from a roll of paper towels to beat somebody. There’s no release of kinetic energy, followed by increased endorphins.

On the other hand, if your goal is to get in a fight with a toddler that leaves you both giggling, these floggers are pretty nice.

The Tommy Tomcat

Going further to the right side of the scale. I designed the Tommy Tomcat for FlogMeBaby, based upon a very expensive toy that somehow disappeared from a play-party, a few decades past. I imagine that there are many hundreds of Tomcats in the world, as a result.

Imagine that you are at a kinky play-party. There is one piggy bottom that is being flogged by every Top in the building, and is still going strong when the Doms are all worn out. That is a very strong signal that it’s time to switch over to Sting as a tactic. Every time that I have tested that theory, I have been rewarded with a VERY happy bottom.

If you follow the breaking-in instructions on my page, then you will have the most accurate toy in your entire collection. I never strike any further away than a quarter-inch or so from my desired target when I am using it. It’s amazingly precise. This photo shows the aftermath of a heavy scene.

This video always gives me a thrill. Frankly, I get turned on, watching how well I use that Tomcat. I don’t usually get to see myself from such a different angle.

The Dragon’s Tongue

My two Dragon’s Tongues were hand-made by a buddy. I would love to find a more durable replacement. I will be investigating the purple and red ones that FlogMeBaby sells for twenty bucks each. Mine have been through hell, as you might imagine. I use them a lot.

They are deceptively mild as you warm up the sub, but a sharp “flick” will raise some serious welts. Definitely not to be used on beginners.

Singletail Whip

We have now arrived at ONE of the ultimately “sting-y” toys (not counting fiber-optic floggers - Those will be featured in a future article). The one in the picture above cost me three or four hundred bucks. It’s an Axel whip. Other Tops will stop me when I walk by, and they will say “Oooh! That’s an Axel, isn’t it?” It IS exquisitely made, and it throws like a dream.

HOWEVER. Again, the average beginner can’t seriously buy something like this, and trust that it’s right for them. Singletail whips are DIFFICULT to learn by yourself, to the point where other people trust you to throw whips around without damage to yourself and others.

Luckily, I have posted a Singletail 101 instructional video, for just such a purpose. Once you know how to achieve a perfect spread of singletail strikes on a pillow, you are a good bet to able to do a really good job on a human being.

For those on a budget, I have designed am inexpensive singletail that I can happily recommend. It is called the PTSM - The Papa Tony Signature Model. I just checked. It’s eighty bucks.

Again, I get no special considerations of any kind from FlogMeBaby. I just want to see more safe, fun kinky play happening in the world. It’s the Approving, Kinky Grandpa in me.

Video Review of the "Thumper" Flogger; with Demos

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Papa Tony:

See the YouTube Video Demo and Review Here

 (alternative link)

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To learn how to be a high-quality, popular flogging Top, go here.

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I review kinky toys periodically.  Mostly, those that pertain to Impact Play, because that is my specialty.  I have recently gotten my hands on a new one, and it excites and pleases me greatly.

The Thumper II flogger, for thirty bucks from FlogMeBaby.com

It's a classic "mop" flogger, meaning that there are twice the number of tails as usual, but each one is half as wide. This makes for an excellent, all-around "thuddy" flogger.  As I declare in the video, If I were to head off to a sophisticated, advanced-level play-party, and only bring ONE toy, then this is what I would bring.

After over forty years of ever-increasing experience, my heart still belongs to good, high-quality BEGINNER toys, with a maximum of all-around use, which I demonstrate in the video.

This is because I am a mentor for Doms, every day.  Younger folks tend to be underemployed in the current economy, and they shouldn't have to choose between a month of groceries, and a toy.  So, I'm always on the lookout for the best bang for the buck.

A tiny part of my collection.  These are the toys waiting to be broken-in.

My $350 flogger, shown here for comparison, to...  

The $30 Thumper flogger.  I do NOT see $320 worth of difference, in terms of design, durability, balance or usability.

I could go on and on, but watch the video at the top of this article.  I see nothing negative, and a LOT of positive in this toy.  I suspect that I will be awarding a lot of these to fine young rising stars in our Tribe, for years to come.

Review: PTSM Singletail Whip, with Instructional Video

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Papa Tony:

This is going to sound like an advertisement.  It is not.  I make ZERO money, kickbacks, spiffs, discounts or any other reimbursement from the community work that I do. 

I am reviewing the "PTSM" whip.  "PTSM" = "Papa Tony Signature Model".  I am Papa Tony.  This is a page of articles that I have posted online. I spend around twenty hours a week, mentoring Tops.  This article, and the energy that I spent bringing the PTSM into the world, is just a small part of that work. I get my payoff from reading the fan-mail that I get, on an ongoing basis.

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The PTSM whip was expressly designed by me, in every detail.

I did this, because I want every sadistic Dom, Top, Sir or Madam to have a superb, high-quality whip without having to choose between FOOD for a month, or a lifetime-quality whip, which usually costs twice, to four times as much. The Recession never went away, for folks who work for a living.

Here is my instructional video for the PTSM whip.

This a link for the earlier, flogger-instruction video, that I mention in the first video.

I work closely with Steve Molla, who runs flogmebaby.com. I help him to design optimal, high-quality toys that cost a TINY fraction of what is found elsewhere. I strongly endorse the Tommy Tomcat and the Mister Thuddy, both of which I helped to design.
The current project is something called the "Papa Tony Signature Model" singletail whip.  It is utter perfection for playing indoors. I specified every detail, and they have absolutely nailed it. I've been playing with the prototype, and it is as fine as any whip that I've ever seen or used.

What makes it so nice?

- Lead shot in the bag in the handle. Perfect for balance, without adding thickness.
- Three-foot length (not counting the cracker).  Doesn’t hit the wall and ceiling when you are using it on a human being indoors.
- Perfect feel, heft and flexibility.  This encourages perfect aim.
- Easily-replaced crackers (I prefer Kevlar crackers, myself).

What are the drawbacks?

Just one:

- It's not as PRETTY as a super-expensive, custom-made whip.  It's also probably one-quarter of the COST, so there is that.

You can buy fancier whips, but not even slightly better for the job at hand:

My preferred pattern, after vertically singletailing a bottom.

I have owned many, MANY whips, and other toys.  Why so many?  I like to bestow them upon rising stars in the community, who have proven their worth, over and over:

Review: Portable St. Andrew's Cross

I attended a few street fairs in San Francisco and Los Angeles, before I finally realized what was right in front of me.  There is a wonderful design for a metal, tubular and portable Saint Andrew's Cross that is rock-solid, but collapses into a smaller collection of parts:

To give an idea of the size, I'm six foot five.

There is a chain that tightly connects the three legs, 

but I hadn't installed it before photographing.

This is what it looks like, set up in a bar, 
decorated with 600 lights, powered by three "D"-cell batteries.
It takes two slaves to set it up. 
I don't have the patience to get the lights untangled. 

These parts can all fit into a large-sized, hard-shell golf-club travel case with wheels.  I bought mine off of Craigslist for forty bucks, instead of full price elsewhere.

I can't install a permanent dungeon into my home, no matter how much I would like to.  However, modern designs for spanking benches, fuck benches, rim-chairs, portable slings and the like allow me to store these items away in a closet or the garage while not in use. It's nice to finally add a truly portable St. Andrew's Cross to the collection!

This is the center core piece that everything else attaches to. The entire assemblage is quite light in weight (compared to the extra-tall sling frame in my collection), though reassuringly stable and strong. Putting it together requires no tools.  It's elegantly engineered.

The back side.  Again, there is a nice chain that connects the three legs at the bottom, but is not shown here.

Pleasantly in use: The slave is 6'1", to give an idea of its use during the cross's break-in ceremony! The slave is a real thrasher, and there was never a moment of instability. I could never say that about the huge, heavy wooden Saint Andrew's Cross in my shed, which never gets used because it is worryingly unstable.

This young man is 5'9", and I think that he will need longer ankle-restraint chains than a taller man.

He disagrees!  He was determined to make it work.

Turns out, he was right!

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WHERE TO GET IT:

Send an email to macdaddydesigns @gmail.com and order from Brian.  He sells the crosses for $299, plus $50 for shipping & handling, in whatever color you want.  I chose gunmetal gray.

The four-foot-by-one-foot-square box was awkward for one person to carry when it arrived, but very easy for two.

It didn't come with assembly instructions, but the only part that we got wrong at first, was the chain that attaches at the BOTTOM of the legs.  The parts just slide together in an obvious way, otherwise

I am very pleased, and can't wait to take it to play-parties in town, and other public events.

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UPDATE:  The biggest "problem with this cross is that all of my kinky friends want to borrow it for play-parties, Pride festival leather tents, and the like.  Other folks tend to use it more than I do!  :->