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2012-10-13 Review of the first HARNESS Party

Things that I remember the most from last night's HARNESS Party:


- Men SMILING.  It was an incredibly jolly crowd.

- Men CLOSE. Many of them man-handling each other in a very masculine fashion.


- Men PLAYING. Flogging, electrical-play, tied up, and grinning so big that their back teeth were showing.


- Men UNIFIED. It was the opposite of the stereotypical "circuit party" vibe. We were brothers, and the newest guys wanted IN, right NOW.  I signed up seventeen new members without any effort at all. Every FetishMan was there to CONTRIBUTE in whatever way he could. It was completely a team effort - not a top-down effort imposed upon us, but a bottom-up, viral and heartfelt squad of men who OWNED that event, all together. It's awesome to behold.

DJ Ryno played exactly the right kind of music 
that was appropriate for a bunch of lusty 
leathermen.  I hope that he continues to spin for us!

A week or so ago, I made some requests, asking my FMSD brothers to show up and help get the new, monthly HARNESS Party started. You clearly got the message, guys, and I'm thoroughly grateful. There were several times more men attending than anybody had anticipated. It's clearly a success that will build very nicely as the months go by.

Mr. San Diego Eagle 2012 Eli 
was our host for the evening, and 
he worked his ass off to make sure 
that everybody felt welcome, included 
and got a chance to play.

But that's not what impressed me most:

I did a lot of continuous market-research, asking every man I met "How did you hear about this event?" There were two answers all evening, and only two:

-"I read it in your newsletter", or
- "My friend invited me to join him", and pointing at another FMSD member.

Spike did a superb job of bootblacking
 over in the Vendor's Section.

I had pre-supposed that the bar's advertising would have had SOME effect, bringing in new faces, but it appears that our large, focused social network has had a major effect. The FMSD social circle is expanding rapidly, because friends are telling friends that they will have a very good time. When they do, then they tell THEIR friends.

It's all Credibility-Based, and it's working better than I ever dreamed it would when FMSD began. Nights like last night are how our Tribe expands at this rapid rate. It couldn't happen if we weren't so damn nice about it.
Mr. SD Leather 2010 Anthony and American Leatherman 2010 Louie
fitted men for harnesses and armbands all night long.

The men at the HARNESS Party were high on the endorphins of Communal Joy.  It wasn't a swarm of lonely, isolated men.  We were a TRIBE. This event is going to get bigger and bigger as the months go by (though the holiday office parties and other seasonal distractions might mess us up until after the first of the year), and the expansion will be 100% due to the men who showed up determined to make this first HARNESS Party a success.

GREAT JOB!